Two Point Museum is the latest in the Two Point series from Two Point Studios, and it’s a solid new addition despite its unexpected setting.
Two Point Studios was founded by former Bullfrog Productions staff and made its name with 2018’s Two Point Hospital, which was a fantastic spiritual successor to Theme Hospital. But despite the studio’s success with a well-trodden formula, it has branched out with simulation game follow-ups to new ground, like 2022’s Two Point Campus and now Two Point Museum.
Personally, I wasn’t quite sure how I felt about Two Point Museum when it was announced. I found Two Point Campus – despite being a good game – to lack some of the magic of its predecessor, leaving me wondering why the studio didn’t go for an easy win like a potential ‘Two Point Theme Park. But despite a museum exhibit not being quite as thrilling as some roller coasters, the two have more in common than you might think.
You take the role of an unnamed curator who has been thrust into the job after the previous caretaker disappeared under mysterious circumstances (amid record-low attendance, funnily enough). Of course, it’s on you to take this institution from a low-rent establishment like The Louvre to a world-renowned institution like the Cupnoodles Museum in Yokohama.
I played around five hours of Two Point Museum, and in that time I took charge of three different museums. The focused on the number one best museum exhibit: dead things. You start off with a measly fossil or two, which is good enough to get people in the building, but unless you absolutely love empty floor space, you’re going to need to claim some more relics.
Adventure time
Remember in Metal Gear Solid V how you could send specific Mother Base soldiers out on missions for supplies? That’s the big new mechanic for Two Point Museum. The staff you hire come in four flavors: Experts, Janitors, Assistants, and Security Guards. Each of them has their own place in the museum (Experts maintain exhibits and do tours; Assistants run the gift shop and ticketing), but they can also be plucked out of their day jobs to head into dangerous wastelands to find new stuff to display.
However, there’s a catch. Obviously you’ll need to manage your budget; otherwise, you can’t send people out on these fancy expeditions. There’s also a number of variables each expedition can have, like the potential for your helicopter to break, obstacles to slow down the trip, and injuries (I even had a death in the ranks, which we all kind of brushed over). You’ll occasionally have to make some tough decisions too, like when I instructed my expedition team to eat the giant man-devouring snake (which resulted in a massive morale boost).
You’ll start off with simple exhibits that just need to be popped onto the floor; the most you’ll need is a few decorations to increase the buzz around them. But as the game advances, you’ll need to balance a lot more. Ice-based exhibits require working freezers to be active at all times, which means that you won’t be able to place them next to your plants, which require a humid climate. And if these facilities aren’t maintained, you’ll be dealing with some dead exotic plants or a thawed-out caveman causing havoc in the museum. In one case I was even able to buy a plot of land to open up a second museum in the area, which adds a whole extra layer that can get a bit overwhelming to keep track of.
The other two museums focused on the supernatural and the sea. So while you’d be collecting dead things in the Prehistory Museum, you’ll be collecting dead and sentient things for the Supernatural area. If you don’t keep the ghosts placated with some nice decorations from the era they died in, there’s nothing stopping them from phasing through the wall and going on the attack. Meanwhile, the fish have to have the perfect conditions; otherwise, those tanks will empty out pretty quickly (it doesn’t seem like you can transfer the fish ghosts to your supernatural exhibits either, sadly).
Bones ‘n’ all
It’s not an extremely tactical game by any means. I consistently had things go wrong; some months my intake was in the minus-thousands, but it never felt punishing in the way some of the old-school tycoon titles could.
While mishaps can happen, your staff will typically be where they need to be and can be trusted to do their thing. Of course, this is just the opening hours; I’m sure there’s potential for everything to be on fire (maybe literally) later on. However, one appreciated touch is you can pause everything while you rejig your entire museum, making redesigns a breeze without the worry of losing out on some dosh.
And of course, there’s that classic dry Two Point humor to keep things light. During the game, you’ll have some radio interludes, including interviews with local experts that complement the smooth soundtrack. But the highlight has to be the intercom announcer; she speaks with the most monotone voice no matter the occasion, with some great one-liners to boot (my favorite so far is “Please be reminded that beauty is in the eye of the beholder; the ball is in your court”). But she’s not just there to be funny; her interjections also work as a hint system to alert you to things that need your attention in the museum, like no staff at the front desks or gift shops.
Two Point Museum isn’t reinventing the wheel, so if you weren’t into the previous games or the genre as a whole, it’s probably not going to get you in this time either. This is what I was expecting to come out feeling, but the gameplay is still as moreish as ever and the differences in each museum make it easy to just switch up your theme if you find yourself getting tired of staring at bones all day.